I should probably take my own advice.

Currently in life I work at a restaurant bar, I am married, I live in an apartment,  and I am not taking any classes but I have met all prerequisites to apply to the nursing program at my local community college. However, in my three attempts to apply (there's no wait list it's just apply until you get in kind of like a lottery) I have not made the cut for the program. The upsetting news broken to me via e-mail simply says "you meet all the requirements for the nursing program this coming semester however the class is full". Oh. OK.

I cried. I then called my husband and in all of his wisdom and kindness tried to console me but I wasn't having it. The things he said were true; keep trying. You'll get in one day. You're smart. All things that would help me pull it together and should comfort me but I just had no interest in hearing any of it. I wanted to be sad. I took some deep breathes, tried to pull myself together because (I forgot to mention) I was at work on break when I read this devastating email, for the third time. As I shook some margaritas for the friday night rush, some tears streamed down my cheeks as I tried to avoid eye contact with any of my customers and co-workers.

Once I left work, I got a bottle of wine had a few glasses and was consoled by the warm embrace of my oh so loving husband as a few tears welled up in my eyes.

Now in reading this I don't want you to feel bad for me. I was you to virtually smack me across the face. Yes I have a right to be upset in some way for trying so hard and not getting in but I should not wallow in the upsetting news when I have SO much to be thankful for and so much good happening in my life. 

I have a problem, that I think most people suffer from as well which is comparing your life to other peoples. I look at other friends my age who have graduated college, started their careers and are building their job titles. I can't compare myself to those people because guess what: they may be looking at me and feeling the same way. "I'm not married yet, I'm not building a home or family just yet and I want to." I look at them and say "I want my big girl job." That thinking has to stop. I have to take a bit of my own advice and realize my chapter 4 in life isn't the same as other people who are my age. Most importantly there is nothing wrong with that. I made decisions in life to change my major which threw me off the education course into something different and now it's taking a little longer. So what. I'll get there someday. 

I am so thankful to have married my best friend at 19 and to some that might be crazy and unreasonable but it was the best decision I have ever made in life to this day. In my first two years of marriage I still took classes and worked through that as well. It's hard but it's worth it and I have a very supportive husband throughout it all. The second I think about other peoples lives, I then complicate my own and almost do it and in justice. I know I'm not the only one who thinks this way. Maybe you're my age and are angry you aren't in a committed relationship, married, making more money, living in a house, whatever it may be but you have to remember that all good things happen when they happen. You can't rush the good stuff. 

I will be a nurse one day. AND even if I realize that maybe that's not what I should do, wherever God leads me, I will do whatever with happiness, joy, love, commitment, honor, integrity, and all things that will make my life enjoyable. I will stop comparing my story to others because I really like my story and don't want to change it. I have to stop reading other peoples books and focus on how good the one I have is. I'm happy right now and that's what matters. I shouldn't but upset over one thing when I have so many other blessings to smile about!